Monday, February 13, 2006

SHAM: Self-Help & Actualization Movement

"Do you sometimes feel at the mercy of impulses you barely knew existed, let alone understand? It's time to seek out the deeper meaning and the divine lesson of thoughtless (and repeated) actions in your life."
Now, wonder how true are the forecasts of your daily horoscope? Just days before, I was contemplating the lessons to be learnt from the futility of thoughtless (and repeated) circumnavigation and non-actions. What do I attempt to accomplish here?
I've certainly got the emergency response but I somehow couldn't muster the courage yet again.
Then, lo and behold, there's this article "Self-help books? No help at all" in the Sunday papers (NST, 12/02/06, F9) that aptly describes my predicament. It's by an editor who concludes that the self-help biz is "a sham that exploits our weaknesses for profit". As a one-time detractor, and now a proponent, I couldn't help but feel party to the whole 'scam'.
Salerno says: "Self-help is an enterprise wherein people holding the thinnest of credentials diagnose, in basically normal people, symptoms of inflated or invented maladies, so that they may then implement remedies that have never been shown to work". He illustrated the phenomenal market growth of 50 percent for self-improvement in the US between 2000 to 2004, and annual gross revenue of USD8.5b to USD31.7b. But the most fascinating bit of information was that the key to self-help biz model was "failure and stagnation".
Then it hit home that I am still stuck in this rut of searching for a solution to "Feel the Fear and Do it Anyway" (Susan Jeffers). It seems that I would forever be doomed to walk the tight rope between "victimisation" and "empowerment". And I thought that this gal is gonna get her groove back, well at least in areas that she is an 'expert' (that I have control over, to use the self-help jargon!)
Well, time to transcend this sense of "positive self-worth", "be spontaneous" and "go with the flow" (easier said than done).
Salam PJ!

1 comment:

Gloria said...

I stumbled on this book while looking for another book in the library, called "Excuse Me Your Life Is Calling." I was told by my life coach to read "Excuse Me" (I won her services in a contest; I was actually more interested in winning the $50 Borders gift card that was part of the prize package) and checked that and SHAM out of the library. I couldn't get through "Excuse Me," it was poorly written and made me more paranoid than I already was. The theory was that if you had any negative thought, it would bring disaster upon you. I became too nervous to think and was worried sick about any negative thought that came my way. I told her I couldn't read it anymore. I did finish SHAM and thoroughly enjoyed it. I recently read it again. It's not a very inspiring book, but it IS funny. Salerno acknowledges that sometimes s--t DOES happen, even in the best of times, and we need to deal with it as best as we can. Sometimes you can "want" something very badly and still not get it. The truth is, some things in life are a gamble and sometimes we win, sometimes we don't. I'm sorta going through that right now and instead of dreaming of a better life, I'm just looking for a job that will feed me and keep the utilities on. I was raised to expect a middle class life, but the last few years have been very hard. Anyway, SHAM should be required reading for self-help book addicts like my neighbor. She must have six dozen of the things, yet her life hasn't seemed to have changed much (cluttered house, low-paying jobs, extremely unhealthy weight) whereas I have changed careers (although not necessarily successfully) but at least I set out to gain a new career skill and I did it without reading a self-help book!